The years of further education are over. It’s time to return home and find a job – WOW! Though that sounds good, it does mean that all of my friends are doing the same too. Meaning that we are all returning to different parts of the country and are not as easy to reach compared to when we all lived in the same city. Problem?
When it comes to life at University or College, living away from home and meeting a group of strangers it can be a bit of a whirlwind experience. However, the friends you make here tend to be your friends for life and we can all admit that we hope that to be the case. But also when it comes to College/University friends, they fall into several groups:
- The Inner Circle – These are a small number of people who you are super close to and well, cannot see your life without them anymore. You see them more like family than friends basically.
- The Good Friends – There tends to be a lot more people in this group who you love spending time with, see often and have a great time with. But they don’t quite make the cut for being that one step higher.
- Just Pals – Again, this group tends to be large also but these are normally friends who you have met through other people or something to that effect. You don’t see them often or contact them a lot but when you do its good and you have fun.
Now, at when you all live in the same City this is great because you tend to see all of them everywhere almost everyday, so it works out pretty well. But now that I have moved back home, along with the majority of my year group due to graduation it means that all three friendship groups are dotted around all over the country and world. For me, as I’d imagine the majority of other people would agree, the priority group is the top – The Inner Circle. This small group of people are super important to you and it’s important to stay in contact because lets face it you cannot afford to lose then (They know too much)!
For me, this is definitely the case. With my small group of friends I am blessed enough to say that we are also one group of friends, not several BBF’s dotted all over the place. We are all in one group and get on like a house on fire, I mean we are all completely different from each other but I think that’s what makes it work so well. Before last year, when a the majority of them went to study abroad, we were all together literally everyday and I loved it. I wish I could say the same about it now.
Since moving home and the rest of my friends returning home too I have been awful with keeping in touch with friends. I mean I message them every week, check in to see how things are going and get any gossip but it’s not the same over flat-texted words. So then there is Video Calls, which is great, but it makes you desperate for physically being with that person. But it’s the physical which causes issues. Due to us all living so far apart, when we want to meet up we try to get everyone together at one time.. which as you can imagine is a hard thing to do and in many cases, when we do get together, it tends not to be as a full group. Even then, it’s not all that often.
So yea, staying in contact online – easy peasy! Send the odd message, leave a comment on social media or have the occasional video chat. Seeing each other in person– not so easy. So many factors to include like travel time, money, working hours/holiday, other plans which over lap. You may work it out quite easily but that is hardly ever the case. All I know is that it can take time and effort to sort this sort of stuff out and yea, it occasionally makes you feel a bit crappy because you feel like you aren’t putting in enough effort. But at the end of the day, when a plan comes together or something spontaneous happens all of that seems to fade away into nothing and you guys all get on as if you have been with each other the whole time.
To sum up, yes it is hard, yes it is time-consuming and yes, at times you will feel like you are losing them but they are worth it. All I can say is what I have learned from my friends – these are the friends for life and whether you talk and see each other everyday or one every few months, it doesn’t change anything.
I love my friends more than anything else, I would bend over backwards for them as I know they would for me, so what I see then only occasionally, I suppose it makes it all the more special!
Has anyone else experienced this since moving away or leaving education? Let me know by commenting below.
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